Tremulous Forum
Community => Off Topic => Topic started by: kharnov on February 03, 2011, 03:13:35 am
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I've been asked once, "hey harno how 2 mara whore". The significance of the question didn't strike me at first, but then I realized something. These days, it's very difficult to mara whore, and the practice definitely takes some skill. Not everyone can mara whore, to be honest. If you think you're someone capable of doing it, read on.
I'm assuming you've already got a mara. I hope you do. Finding a wild mara is next to impossible, so make sure you pick a proper breeder and not some third rate mara mill. Don't forget to inspect the facilities before purchasing a mara. The eggs should not be oozing acid blood, and a team of grangers should be gurgling and crawling around the ceiling. If the grangers don't crawl on the walls and ceiling, it's likely just a stage 1 facility. You won't get the best maras this way.
When you have your mara, put some makeup on it. Don't be too gaudy. Some eyeliner and lipstick will do. Here is an example of a properly decorated mara:
(http://i.imgur.com/03dwa.jpg)
The next steps are not appropriate for a family-friendly forum, and they will thus be omitted. No, there is nothing obscene about mara whoring. Only a sick person would think this. It's just too gory describing how well your mara is going to bite off entire human heads with one chomp. The makeup is only there to ensure that your mara has a positive self image. Don't remind them of their enormous underbite. That's cruel.
Good luck mara whoring.
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While I certainly approve of the make-up, just understated enough, you seem to have left poor mara sadly lacking in other departments, i've attempted to rectify the situation.
(http://i.imgur.com/Xxqw1.jpg)
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Ke$ha? Is that you?
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Beautiful work, Tremulant. I nearly barfed out my breakfast despite morning not coming for another seven hours or so. That mara will go many places.
However, I feel it's lacking a certain Myspace charm.
(http://i.imgur.com/2kZKA.gif)
My god.
It's full of stars.
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With those sparkles you have attained perfection, any attempt to further beautify this beast will only serve to cheapen her, let us stand back and bask in her glory.
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I like that. Shucks, it's too big. I guess that makes me and it more cool.
Only moderator with a avatar scroll bar, oh yes.
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Tremulous is probally the best freeware you will ever play. whats better then being a humman gunning down aliens or an alied killing soem humans.
Yams men its a gr8.
Also, female adv maras are mistakes caused by genetic mutations and die quickly because of incompatibility with boostershrimps, which are the mates for male adv maras.
I would know. I'm the KingOfBaslick.
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I like that. Shucks, it's too big. I guess that makes me and it more cool.
Only moderator with a avatar scroll bar, oh yes.
Lol.
Ain't you already? :(
Anyway, nice job Kharnov and Tremulant. I think someone has his/her laughs of this week... (And someone should have recorded my glaring, when I saw final product.)
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Tremulous is probally the best freeware you will ever play. whats better then being a humman gunning down aliens or an alied killing soem humans.
Yams men its a gr8.
Also, female adv maras are mistakes caused by genetic mutations and die quickly because of incompatibility with boostershrimps, which are the mates for male adv maras.
I would know. I'm the KingOfBaslick.
Female mara's rarely exist, as most are androgynous, so you are correct in saying that a female mara is caused by a genetic mutation. However, there are also few male Mara's, so you are incorrect there. Just because it isn't female doesn't mean it can't be a whore. Please don't spread your sexist beliefs on this forum, androgynous aliens can be whores too.
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Anyone can be a whore. <unfunny your mom joke>
Get over it.
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Except me. I am not a whore. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rAuCN65LaB0)
But I like to do it!
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That marauder is fabulous! :laugh:
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(http://i.imgur.com/sFgF7.gif)
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Let's put that in the game as the first official "choose M or F model" option. It can have higher pitched sounds than the male mara, now doesn't that sound like it'd be great?
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Female Adv mara's are more aggresive, aren't they?
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Beautiful work, Tremulant. I nearly barfed out my breakfast despite morning not coming for another seven hours or so. That mara will go many places.
However, I feel it's lacking a certain Myspace charm.
(http://i.imgur.com/2kZKA.gif)
My god.
It's full of stars.
no one states that that mara whore is not something you would pay for. Instead, it is more likely to rape you says no one.