Author Topic: Story by WhiteTech  (Read 5746 times)

WhiteTech

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Story by WhiteTech
« on: September 30, 2010, 05:01:41 am »
   INTRO

   Humans have been put to the edge. Staving, fighting, dirty. The New Global Government has been keeping its precious money for “the war effort”. We all know there's more then enough money for the war and to feed the world.
   Countries starting falling apart since first contact. People started fighting against their governments, until everyone massed together. The whole world rebelled and created The New Global Government. I never understood  why it was “so much better”. They're the same as our old corrupt governments, but now they control everything. Well, what's left anyway.   
   
   Its rumoured it started in a science lab. They found a way to expand worm holes for a few milliseconds, just enough time to teleport someone... or something. The problem was back then, they didn't know how to set a destination for the exit of the worm hole, and being a worm hole, it was two-way, so things can enter on the other side. The first time they opened a worm hole, it just so happened to open on an alien planet. Even though it was only open for the few milliseconds they could have it open, it opened on a creature teleporting it back to earth. The military calls this creature a “Granger”.
   It's kind of bug-like, and the size of a dog. I didn't believe it at first when I saw it on T.V.. The news headline with a picture reading “Contact has been made with Aliens”. Small dark-grey six legged creature. The two front legs were slightly wider, and it walked half dragging its self on the ground. It had a small head with a large rear potion of the body. The multiple eyes, small black, beady eyes. I felt like screaming the first time they showed it. Little did we know, it would almost end our already damaged human race.
   They shortly found out it spawn other stationary aliens. Almost like desk sized living buildings. The biggest one some sort of Overmind, that controls other alien “buildings” and partly seed to control the alien its self. About a week since the “Overmind” was built, the alien, the Granger, built...or spawned.... an egg. Only this egg could keep birthing aliens, more and more, but only 2 kinds. A small spider like one the military now calls a “Dretch” and Grangers. Who knew Dretches had a deadly bite, and all the aliens could evolve into meaner, more blood thirsty, brutal aliens... after they ate enough flesh.



Chapter One

   “Kit! Stop watching that T.V, I need you to go down town” My mom is always nagging at me about the T.V. I watch it when ever I can. When it's on at least. The New Global Government, wants to limit electricity use. Another one of its “energy for the war” strategies. The Military's teleporters take a lot of energy to use. So, each Division gets to share whats left.
   I reach and turn the nob off. We have enough technology to have hover cars, but the global rebellions and the war against the aliens has set us back to using antiques for everyday life.
   I head down the dark unlit wood stairs to the kitchen. My mom has the fridge out in the open looking hopelessly at the back. “I see the fridge is broken again” I say to her.
    She looks up “Yeah, what else is new” Her voice is dry and raspy. She's getting sick again. She walks over to the counter and picks up a bag. “ I need you to get some bread for dinner tonight, and hurry back! I need the left over money for the repair man to fix the fridge”
   “You sound like you're getting sick”
   “Does it? I better have some tea” She replies.
   I walk over to her, kiss her on the cheek, and walk out. Money and bag in hand.



Chapter 2

   I've always hated walking down the street, any street, they're all the same. Dirty, dark, people always fighting for the little food there really is. Unfortunately, this is how it is everywhere. Not just our Division. The world has been pushed to the breaking point ever since the aliens were first discovered. We are now only left on the only land that's still here, its about half size of old North America, and there aren't to many people left to occupy it.

END

Sorry I haven't even come close to finishing it. I might, donno yet. ;)

superspirality

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Re: Story by WhiteTech
« Reply #1 on: September 30, 2010, 06:03:18 pm »
Hmm, I like it.
But...why so short yet? Hope to see more, keep up.
Oh, and yes, why no granger glory? I want it to be cute and gurgling, not making people scream. D:

CreatureofHell

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Re: Story by WhiteTech
« Reply #2 on: September 30, 2010, 10:25:43 pm »
A few stray capitals and commas in there...
Whenever is one word...
It's interesting...but I have no idea where the story is going and so I am very confused...
{NoS}StalKer
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<Timbo> posting on the trem forums rarely results in anything good

WhiteTech

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Re: Story by WhiteTech
« Reply #3 on: October 01, 2010, 12:25:27 am »
A few stray capitals and commas in there...
Whenever is one word...
It's interesting...but I have no idea where the story is going and so I am very confused...

I stopped in mid paragraph there at the end

Well, I was going to straighten everything out once she got down town, and I haven't proof read it yet, but we'll see how long I go with writing this. Judging how long this small piece is, and where I want to go with it.... adding a little description here and there... the whole story it could be 3 novels long :l

What are you confused about? ??? I could fix it.

this is my first actual story, so I might have it straight in my head, but it might not be to everyone else.


lol and if you saw a bug like alien or any alien, I can't imagine you'd say "Oh look how cute it is" :l


mooseberry

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Re: Story by WhiteTech
« Reply #4 on: October 01, 2010, 01:59:42 am »
The title sucks.
Bucket: [You hear the distant howl of a coyote losing at Counterstrike.]

मैं हिन्दी का समर्थन

~Mooseberry.

CreatureofHell

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Re: Story by WhiteTech
« Reply #5 on: October 01, 2010, 12:50:10 pm »
A few stray capitals and commas in there...
Whenever is one word...
It's interesting...but I have no idea where the story is going and so I am very confused...

I stopped in mid paragraph there at the end

Well, I was going to straighten everything out once she got down town, and I haven't proof read it yet, but we'll see how long I go with writing this. Judging how long this small piece is, and where I want to go with it.... adding a little description here and there... the whole story it could be 3 novels long :l

What are you confused about? ??? I could fix it.

this is my first actual story, so I might have it straight in my head, but it might not be to everyone else.


lol and if you saw a bug like alien or any alien, I can't imagine you'd say "Oh look how cute it is" :l



The person is a she? You managed to hide that fact very well...
{NoS}StalKer
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<Timbo> posting on the trem forums rarely results in anything good

WhiteTech

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Re: Story by WhiteTech
« Reply #6 on: October 07, 2010, 12:42:26 am »
The title sucks.


...um well duh, there is no title.

I revamped it and kept on writing some more. I might post it up soon